Teenage Stress

The teenage years of without a doubt the years in a child’s life that are rife with change. Change itself for most of us is a stress element…

teenagers + change = stress

Teenage years are very self centered and selfish years for children. As a parents you need to be very aware of this. This is not to say that parents are the cause of teen stress.

Much of teenage stress is a by product of gaining more personal freedom which also begets more personal responsibilities and higher expectations from parents. The teenage years are years of transitioning from a child to young adult. Although with this comes greater personal freedom, however, unfettered and uncontrolled freedom for the teen is a recipe for stress between a parent and teen.

It would be unreasonable for a parent of a young teenager to think that the teen intuitively knows how to handle and cope with these new challenges and responsibilities of life without an experienced guide (you). Even such simple concepts (from a parents view anyway) as knowing ways to earn then budget money for their increasingly more expensive tastes can cause great stress for a teenager especially if they feel as though they are on an island with no help in sight.

Yet it is also true that the teen is no longer a child (especially in their mind!). Teens have a very complex and often competing sense of values and decision points. Peer pressure reaches an all time high. Social ‘clicks’ are prevalent… and even their bodies are changing rapidly.

Wow… can you remember… you couldn’t pay me enough to go back there!

As teens begin to exercise their new expanded freedoms, they will inevitably occasionally push your parental envelop… the result… you guessed it … teenage stress. And each time this happens, new negotiating and problem solving seeds are planted. But having no tools to work with initially at this young age does indeed fuel stress.

A tough dichotomy for a teenager to be sure – having new found independence and as such using their own skills and management devices – yet at the same time not being allowed to make all autonomous and independent choices when dealing with their issues and consequences… will undoubtedly result in stress for the teen.

The first part leaves a teen having to solve problems that they simply aren’t equipped and don’t have the experience to do; while the second seems (to them) to be putting restrictors on their ability to grow and learn how to solve issues themselves.

Continued…
Teenage Stress 2